It has been a while! LB is 4 months and 1 week old! Time is flying. I am back at work now. It has been hard. I miss him so much when I am at work, and just can't wait to get home to his sweet smiles and laughs. He is growing so fast. At his 4 month check up he was 13 lbs 10 oz, 24 1/2 inches!
I am doing great. I have been working hard at losing the weight. I have lost 35 lbs so far. I also started weightwatchers and that is helping a lot. I still have a lot to lose. I lost all of the pregnancy weight but I still gotta lose that "I got married and got fat" weight.
LB slept through the night last night. 8:30-7! AWESOME!!! I was so excited. We just started feeding him rice cereal so I think that is helping. Also we dropped the swaddle too. I am so proud with how good he is doing. I do believe I have the best little boy in the whole wide world! :)
I am so looking forward to Christmas. We took LB to see Santa. He was so cute. Even though he will have no idea what's really going on I can't wait to give him his presents!
That's all for now. Merry Christmas!!
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
A Letter to my Baby
Dear sweet boy,
Tomorrow you will be 3 months olds. I can not believe how fast time flies. I am sitting here at home with you while daddy is at work. This is my last week home with you before I have to go back to work, and I am soaking up every second of it. You have been the sweetest, most precious baby. You have been so patient with me as I have learned to adapt to new things.
The first time I changed your diaper I was so nervous, but you just sat there so still and patient and watched me while I did it. When I changed your outfit, no matter how long it took or how uncomfortable it was for you, you sat there patiently the whole time. I am so grateful for such a sweet boy, and I am so sure this will carry on throughout your life.
I was unable to hold you when you were first born because I was sick and had to have medicine, but I remember the very moment you were born. It was 9:05pm and I heard the doctor's say, "wow look at all of that hair!" Then I heard your first cry. They brought me to you and you heard my voice and instantly looked at me. I was so overwhelmed with love for you, and always will be for the rest of my life. You daddy took such good care of you the next day when mommy was sick. He loves you so much and is such an amazing father. He took great care of me too. He was incredible for the both of us. When I was finally able to hold you my heart wanted to explode from all of the love I had for you.
I just could not believe you were my son. You were so perfect. You were absolutely sweet and the nurses just adored you. I loved your head full of hair. It was so cute and you still have that crazy head full of hair. It sticks up all over the place and people tell me all of the time how much they love it. It still blows my mind to think you are my son. How did I get so lucky? God truly gave me the greatest blessing when he sent me you.
I can't say that it hasn't been hard. My body hurts and I'm so tired all of the time. I have had to overcome some things I didn't think I would be able to do. You made things so much easier for me though, because you are such a wonderful baby. When I see your adorable smiles and hear you giggle, those 2am feedings don't seem so bad. My life is so much more wonderful with you in it!!
I want you to know that I will always love you. You will always be my baby. I will be here to support you in whatever you do. You and your father are the most important things in my life and I would do anything for the two of you. I will be there for you whenever you need me. You make me the happiest girl in the whole world. I am so proud to be your mother and always will be.
Love you forever,
mommy
Friday, November 4, 2011
Mommy Duties
So being a mom is hard. Really hard. I don't think I was ever prepared for just how hard it is. I keep looking forward to the day everyone tells me it gets easier, whenever that might be. My little one is almost 12 weeks...so hard to believe!! He is growing so much and gets cuter and cuter every day. He is smiling all of the time and has started trying to laugh. He has a blast on the kick and play piano mat we just got him, which is so much fun to watch. These are the things that make all of the hard work worth it.
Lack of sleep is the biggest obstacle. I have had a couple of full nights sleep thanks to grandparents and my wonderful hubby, but apparently I need more. Sometimes I just break down from so little sleep and I feel terrible for complaining and it makes me feel like a terrible mother. I know I'm a good mom though and I just have to remember that.
He is getting bigger and wigglier so some things are getting more difficult. Diaper changes...not too bad but getting harder. He is getting heavier. It is getting cold so we have to start putting him in winter clothes which means more snaps.
I do absolutely love being a mother though. It is the most rewarding thing I have ever done, and also the most difficult. Just because it is hard does not mean I don't love it. I feel extremely proud of myself for the things I have overcome so far. I love my little man so much. I really need to remember how fast time flies and soon I will miss this.
Lack of sleep is the biggest obstacle. I have had a couple of full nights sleep thanks to grandparents and my wonderful hubby, but apparently I need more. Sometimes I just break down from so little sleep and I feel terrible for complaining and it makes me feel like a terrible mother. I know I'm a good mom though and I just have to remember that.
He is getting bigger and wigglier so some things are getting more difficult. Diaper changes...not too bad but getting harder. He is getting heavier. It is getting cold so we have to start putting him in winter clothes which means more snaps.
I do absolutely love being a mother though. It is the most rewarding thing I have ever done, and also the most difficult. Just because it is hard does not mean I don't love it. I feel extremely proud of myself for the things I have overcome so far. I love my little man so much. I really need to remember how fast time flies and soon I will miss this.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Almost 2 Months!
LB will be 2 months next Saturday. I can't believe how fast time is flying. I figured I would finally update since all I have put recently is a couple of tickers. The last 2 months have been the most difficult and also the most rewarding months of my life.
Hubby finally went back to work a couple weeks ago, so 3 days a week it has just been me and little buddy. Those days are hard, I'm not gunna lie. I think they would be hard for anyone. It is so nice to have someone to share the responsibilities with. The days he works I do everything, including the every night shift. LB has been going through good and bad times at night. Sometimes he will have 5 hour stretches and sometimes they will only be 2 hours. Those are hard. I have never been "fun" on lack of sleep, so these last couple of months have been challenging to say the least. Oh my gosh I miss sleep so much! It is all sooooo worth it though!!
I finally figured out the car seat issue. I can get it in and out of the car now. We had to create an adjustment to help, and it works. Today the hubby is working and I am taking him out by myself for this first time. I'm nervous but it needs to be done. I hope it is easy and works out ok.
My emotions have still been crazy. Post-partum hormones are serious. Lack of sleep does not help either. Sometimes I really beat myself up. I have good days and bad. When I'm here by myself and LB gets upset and I can't calm him like hubby does, it really throws me off and I get really upset. Hubby can walk around with him and pat his butt and I can't do that. Yes I have calmed him plenty of times but sometimes I think negatively. Luckily I have a great hubby that reminds me of all the things I have done and can do. I really need to work on my confidence and stop beating myself up.
He has started smiling here and there, and that melts my heart so much!! He is absolutely precious and I am so in love. He is getting so big and has already grown out of some of his clothes which makes me excited but sad too at how fast its going. This week is our anniversary and my birthday is the week after so next weekend we are letting him stay a couple nights at his grandparent's house. I am so nervous and I am going to miss him like crazy!!
Despite my crazy emotions at times I truly am so happy and feel so blessed. I have a wonderful family of 3 now and I could not be more happy. I look forward to so much!
Hubby finally went back to work a couple weeks ago, so 3 days a week it has just been me and little buddy. Those days are hard, I'm not gunna lie. I think they would be hard for anyone. It is so nice to have someone to share the responsibilities with. The days he works I do everything, including the every night shift. LB has been going through good and bad times at night. Sometimes he will have 5 hour stretches and sometimes they will only be 2 hours. Those are hard. I have never been "fun" on lack of sleep, so these last couple of months have been challenging to say the least. Oh my gosh I miss sleep so much! It is all sooooo worth it though!!
I finally figured out the car seat issue. I can get it in and out of the car now. We had to create an adjustment to help, and it works. Today the hubby is working and I am taking him out by myself for this first time. I'm nervous but it needs to be done. I hope it is easy and works out ok.
My emotions have still been crazy. Post-partum hormones are serious. Lack of sleep does not help either. Sometimes I really beat myself up. I have good days and bad. When I'm here by myself and LB gets upset and I can't calm him like hubby does, it really throws me off and I get really upset. Hubby can walk around with him and pat his butt and I can't do that. Yes I have calmed him plenty of times but sometimes I think negatively. Luckily I have a great hubby that reminds me of all the things I have done and can do. I really need to work on my confidence and stop beating myself up.
He has started smiling here and there, and that melts my heart so much!! He is absolutely precious and I am so in love. He is getting so big and has already grown out of some of his clothes which makes me excited but sad too at how fast its going. This week is our anniversary and my birthday is the week after so next weekend we are letting him stay a couple nights at his grandparent's house. I am so nervous and I am going to miss him like crazy!!
Despite my crazy emotions at times I truly am so happy and feel so blessed. I have a wonderful family of 3 now and I could not be more happy. I look forward to so much!
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
Little Buddy
For the sake of our privacy and with this being a public blog, I will call our baby Little Buddy, and abbreviate that to LB. That's what I have been calling him, and I'm sure it will stick, at least for me. So LB will be 4 weeks old on Monday. Time is flying already! He is so perfect and precious, and I am so so in love. He is just the best baby and hardy ever cries, at least for now. He did have a fussy time yesterday but unfortunately I think he may have a cold, and might even have some reflux.
So the last 4 weeks have been great. I love LB so much. I have had my ups and downs though. My hormones have been out of control. Things are pretty difficult with arthrogryposis, and mix in some crazy hormones and you get a hot mess. The first couple of weeks I pretty much let the hubby do everything. I was scared I would hurt him or wouldn't do something right. The only thing I was good at was hold him and singing to him and talking to him. I could tell he adored me, which made things a lot easier, but I was still depressed that I wasn't able or felt like I could do more.
I wanted to breastfeed so bad. That was my first set-back. It was too difficult to find a good position to hold him in, plus my milk never really came in very good. Then we went to formula and fed him with a bottle. Who knew holding a baby and a bottle and trying to burp him would be so hard. That has been the hardest thing for me, and feeding my baby is the most important thing! Can you imagine how my emotions have been? I have been having the hubby feed him most of the time. I have mastered diaper changes and even changing clothes, but the feeding...ahh. It is so hard. I just don't want to jostle him too much and I don't want to hurt him when I'm moving him around trying to burp him. The hubby says I do great but I just am not the most confident with that yet.
I still have things I have to learn that I haven't had to really deal with yet, like getting the carseat out of the car. I will get there. I am feeling more confident every day. I hope to master the feeding soon. It is tough though, but like I have done with everything else growing up, I will keep trying until I get it! My little one deserves it. He truly is great and so patient with me. I am so blessed.
So the last 4 weeks have been great. I love LB so much. I have had my ups and downs though. My hormones have been out of control. Things are pretty difficult with arthrogryposis, and mix in some crazy hormones and you get a hot mess. The first couple of weeks I pretty much let the hubby do everything. I was scared I would hurt him or wouldn't do something right. The only thing I was good at was hold him and singing to him and talking to him. I could tell he adored me, which made things a lot easier, but I was still depressed that I wasn't able or felt like I could do more.
I wanted to breastfeed so bad. That was my first set-back. It was too difficult to find a good position to hold him in, plus my milk never really came in very good. Then we went to formula and fed him with a bottle. Who knew holding a baby and a bottle and trying to burp him would be so hard. That has been the hardest thing for me, and feeding my baby is the most important thing! Can you imagine how my emotions have been? I have been having the hubby feed him most of the time. I have mastered diaper changes and even changing clothes, but the feeding...ahh. It is so hard. I just don't want to jostle him too much and I don't want to hurt him when I'm moving him around trying to burp him. The hubby says I do great but I just am not the most confident with that yet.
I still have things I have to learn that I haven't had to really deal with yet, like getting the carseat out of the car. I will get there. I am feeling more confident every day. I hope to master the feeding soon. It is tough though, but like I have done with everything else growing up, I will keep trying until I get it! My little one deserves it. He truly is great and so patient with me. I am so blessed.
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